“Oh look, Louise,” trumpeted Mrs. Fishbaum as the Biddies were settling down at their usual brunch table, “your sandwich is today’s special!”
“Whaddaya mean, my sandwich?” Louise, who hadn’t yet had her morning coffee, was in no mood for games.
“You know,” Mrs. Fishbaum sing-songed with far too much enjoyment, “the one with bacon, lettuce, tomato, and cheese. But instead of avocado they use hummus.”
Gloria gave Mrs. Fishbaum a disapproving look. “Oh, Elle. Don’t be so… racist,” she whispered the word as if it were pornographic. ”Just because it has hummus on it doesn’t mean Louise will like it.”
“She’s not racist,” Louise grumbled, adjusting in her chair, “just ignorant. Jews don’t even eat bacon, ya meshugana shiksa!”
“Uh… I don’t think that’s what she was referring to,” muttered Mrs. Larsen, pointing nervously toward the Menu board.
And they all turned in unison to read what was written there beneath the words TODAY’S SPECIAL: